Threesome wrecked my marriage

Dear Pastor,

I am writing to you for your help. I am in my 50s and I have been married for 12 years.

My wife is 10 years younger than I am. I am going to tell you the straight facts. I used to have many girlfriends, but I realised that it doesn't make sense having many women. I went to a PTA meeting and I saw one of the teachers and our eyes met. I told myself I am going to try my luck. After the meeting, I introduced myself to her and she was very polite. I asked her for her cell number and she gave it to me. That very evening I called her and I asked her if we could meet. She asked me if the meeting was to discuss the welfare of my child and I told her no, it was to discuss our welfare. She laughed and told me she is not looking for a man because there are many of them around her, and she can choose one. She said she knows them, but she did not know me.

However, we decided to meet. She told me when we met that I was a brave man, because the man she would love to have should have his own house and vehicle. I told her that I have the vehicle, but I don't have my own house. To cut a long story, it took six months before this woman agreed to go to bed with me. I had to take an AIDS test and show it to her before she consented. She was a church girl, so she said it was bothering her to have sex with me since I was a 'worlian'. I started to attend her church, but her pastor refused to marry us because he said that she was marrying a man outside of the faith and we would be unequally yoked.

But I got this woman pregnant, so the pastor said that he would no longer object to us getting married. While she was pregnant, I broke my vows. I went back to two of the women that I had before I married this angel girl. These women were friends and both of them called my wife and told her. I thought my wife was going crazy. To make it worse, I had a threesome with them. They sent my wife a picture of me in bed with them.

Now I have lost my wife. I have begged and begged until I am tired, asking her for forgiveness. I have gone to the pastor and he cannot help me. I was trying to tell my wife that one reason why I went with these women was because they needed financial help and they were the ones who suggested that they would have a threesome with me. My wife has refused to forgive me. I do not know whether you can meet with us and beg her to come back to me. I have got down on my knees. I don't know what to do again.

These girls are not even as beautiful as my wife. They behave like prostitutes in bed. While they were working me over, they asked me if I missed good sex and I made a mistake by saying yes. They told my wife all of that.

Please, Pastor, help us by meeting with us.

L.P.

Dear L.P.,

You are making a big mistake if you believe that by meeting with your wife and you, I would persuade her to renew the relationship with you and go back to the matrimonial bed.

Whether you know it or not, this woman tried to protect herself before becoming intimate with you and marrying you. She knew that she was not marrying an angel because you had admitted to her that you were a wild man. But she wanted to settle down and she believed you. When you got her pregnant, her pastor changed his mind and officiated at your wedding. He knew that it would not be the ideal relationship, but it would be better for this woman to be married than to give birth outside of wedlock. You had played the fool by going back to two of your bad girls and engaging in threesome with them.

Would I meet with your wife and you? The answer is yes. Would I try to persuade your wife to continue the relationship? My answer is no. I would tell her that that decision is solely up to her because I know that you are not a man who can be trusted.

Pastor